Cultivate

Today I threw a muffin at my nan. Unintentionaley of course, a wasp landed on my finger but still.

It’s actually really hard to get the perfect Starbucks. I saw one of Zoella’s posts. It was of your standard white girl drink, a pumpkin spice latte, with whipped cream and chocolate flakes. If anything screamed Autumn goals it was that picture. So I jumped in the shower threw on some sweats and rolled ďown to Starbucks. I ordered a Maple Latte, just to be different, cream ontop, obviously and a cinnamon bun, because that sums up autumn. But once you get the perfect angle, the cream is melting and it is one of the most frustrating first world problems that you could have. Trust me. Bloody Zoella.

However a maple Latte is beautiful and it should be the next coffee you drink.

I’ve really struggled this weekend in knowing what I want to do and I’m getting a bit overwhelmed. Do I want to blog full time? Do I want to Vlog? Focus on makeup? invitations? fashion? Ultimately do I want to work for myself? There are so many avenues and I’m just getting a bit lost choosing one. You look at bloggers and influencers and they have the perfectly cultivated feeds. Their grids are a work of art and I just can’t do that. I toyed with the idea of having two separate Instagram accounts because one moment I feel super motivated to cultivate and have a perfect feed. Then the other I get stressed out that I have to flick between two accounts.

Jenna Kutcher really helps because she only has one account, and I feel very similar to her, I want my life to be my business. I know that sounds ridiculous, but doing a bit of everything is what I aspire to do …. side hustle. I made a second Instagram account at the weekend, lasted for about 10 minuets before I deleted it. Sometimes I feel as though I should have one, then change my mind almost immediately. I think I need to just focus on the one account atm while I figure stuff out. That’s actually what I need to do. Focus on one thing at a time, rather than multiple things all at once, getting myself into a complete muddle then giving up.

So I’m going to work on my Instagram, try really hard to cultivate it.

There are quite a few self help guides out there. How to build your blog and grow your business. The only issue is I don’t know what my business is. I struggle to cultivate because I’m not sure in my mind what I want to create

They also travel the world. Go to all these big amazing places. I love to travel as much as the next person I really do and I would love nothing more than saying “I feel like going to Paris this weekend” then jetting off for three weeks. But I also want a simple life, that’s all I’ve ever wanted really. To sit at home and write my blog. Design a few invitations, taking pictures for Instagram, maybe even write a book.

That’s the simple dream.

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